why we're set apart part dos

hello again!

thanks for those who have responded to my first post and given me feedback (whether through chatting or telling me in person). i really appreciate it; plus, it encourages me to know that the things i write are somewhat comprehensible! haha

now, to continue with what i talked about from the first post...

like i said earlier, i really hate anything that has to do with my car due to all my past incidents. i was so confident that God wouldn't have anything else happen to my car, because i thought i had enough trying circumstances that are car related. but nope, God knows that my car is a big test of my dependency and trust in Him.

on the night my car got towed, i was getting very anxious and worried [because 1) at the time, i wasn't sure if my car had gotten stolen or not, and 2) all of my study materials for my next day midterm, laptop, phone, and wallet were in my car]. ribby, my sister, & mike were all at the house w/me at the time, and they were all trying to help me figure out where my car went. rib and my sister were trying to get a hold of the impound while mike talked to each neighbor to see if they called to get my car towed away. he even drove me around the neighborhood to see if the tow truck was still around with my car. after a couple hours of searching and making phone calls, there was no sign of my car. what was i going to do? i had no car, and i couldn't study for my exam. how could i ever be prepared for my midterm when it was already late at night?

the only thing i could do was to pray. i had no idea how i was going to be able to find my car, but after praying, i know that God's truth never changes. He purposely let this situation happen for my sake; this circumstance was for me to draw nearer to Him. and i trusted that. how could i deny that God is ALWAYS good? it's so easy to forget, and i know that as i was having my anxious moments, i was not believing that God was still good.

after i had a short time to myself, mike & my sister suggested that I email my professor to see if i could get an extension on my exam. ribby offered to take me to barnes & nobles to find the books i needed to study for my class. we even got some coffee, so that i could stay awake to study if i needed to. her generosity towards me by paying for both my books and drink really encouraged me and was a portion of why i really appreciated her. we decided to give another shot at calling the police to see if my car was towed. and thankfully, it was. haha, it's kind of funny to be saying how happy i am to have gotten my car towed, but it was such a relief to know that it wasn't stolen.

it was already past midnight, but my sister and mike (who both had work very early the next morning) were willing to take me to the impound. my car was only gone for a few hours, but the payment was pretty ridiculous. i was starting to imagine what kind of burden this would be to my parents, but mike and my sister were both reminding me that it was okay...that it's only money. they were right; i hold on too preciously to the "value" of money. also, during the time we had to wait outside for the towing man to get my car, my sister actually allowed me to rest my head on her shoulder. it seems kind of silly, but that was a huge deal for me. i always knew that my sister cared about me, but she's not the affectionate type towards me. so when she was okay with this head-resting-on-shoulder action, i was so thankful that she could comfort me in this way.

that night was super humbling. it was definitely a slap in the face that i just didn't go to God right away when my car had gone missing. and yet He still decided to pour His grace on me by giving me my car back, revealing to me how blessed I am to have my sister, Mike, and Rib in my life, and giving my professor the kindness to give me an extension on my exam. i praised God for this night. this isn't the exact scenario a person would see as a joyful event. but because we're set apart, i could rejoice in the fact that this event was to draw me nearer to God...to find dependency in Him alone...to see the importance of prayer...to trust in His goodness.

if it takes car accidents, tickets, and tows to bring me closer to Him, then God... bring them onto me.

why we're set apart part 1

hello!

it's been a while since i've blogged (i believe the last time i ever posted an online entry was during the xanga days). to be honest, i am by no means a creative thinker/writer...i'm almost embarrassed to be publicly displaying my journal entries. BUT life is not about me. the purpose of this blog is to definitely apply from one of the principles that we learned from this past weekend's family retreat: remember. it's sad to see how easily i forget the constant goodness & greatness of God. so my hope is that i will be able to share with others & remind myself of the Lord's faithfulness in my life, the joy that He brings even in the midst of trials, and the things that He's provided for my enjoyment (particularly photographs)!

so...to expand more on the title of this entry, let me first share a series of "unfortunate" events that have happened over the course of this week:

1. tuesday morning-took my car to the Allstate Inspection facility. quick explanation of why i went there in the first place: backed into one of my housemate's car and caused a "minor" fender bender; was going to pay out of the pocket, but damage on her car turned out to be a lot more than i expected (my car also got some boo-boos); daddy said to just have the insurance deal with it, hence my car at the inspection center.
2. monday night -got a parking ticket. wasn't able to go back early enough to renew my parking pass for the day.
3. wednesday night -had a midterm to study for, but needed to stop by home. parked in front of my driveway close to 9pm, where my car interfered with a "no parking zone". was originally going to just run up and grab my charger for my laptop to study, but ended up eating some dinner & chatting w/my sis+mike+rib before going. realized my phone was inside the car, so went outside towards my car but saw no car where i had last put it. eventually found out that car was towed.

sounds really bad, right? don't worry, it's not all storms&lightning.

if you knew me fairly well enough, you would know that i have not had great experience when it came to cars. even just within this past summer, i got scammed by some "autoshop pro," who ended up ruining more of the exterior of my car, and i got rear ended on the freeway. although only one of those situations was my fault, i did get in trouble under both circumstances. so based off those two events, i loathed anything that had to do with me + my car put together. i told myself that i was NEVER going to go through those kinds of situations again. well, obviously God had other plans for me.

i can now say how thankful i am for each of the car events that happened from this week.
starting with the first, i came into the inspection facility with a sad and bitter attitude. i knew that my insurance was going to up, even when it was such a small accident. one of the employees who was going to inspect my car asked me to sit in the waiting room until further notice (he was busy with something at the time). i thought it would take a while, so i opened up my bible and read a couple chapters until the employee saw me and said, "hey, that's my favorite book ever! actually, that's the only book i read". i was delighted to see look of joy & excitement in his face.

as we went outside to get my car inspected, we both informed each other how we are christians, and he ended up sharing some wisdom and encouragement with me. we went from talking about how the bible is the only source we can put complete trust in since it is purely from the mouth of the Lord. he even called it "man's everyday manual"...or something like that. but what really stuck out to me when he shared was how we ought to be lights of this world. it's so crazy how he mentioned that since we had just gone over that during the retreat (a few days before this). he told me that how we're living our lives right now is not for ourselves. they're for God and to help others see that we're not of this world. by living in accordance to His word, people will notice how we handle difficult situations differently, how we find joy in all things. lastly, he added in that he was really thankful that the Lord happened to bring me on that day to the inspection facility and that he's always thankful when he meets a Christian at the office. i couldn't help but smile at the man who encouraged someone like me, whom he had just met.

gosh, i didn't deserve that...i came into that office with such an unthankful heart to the Lord. i knew it was my own fault in causing the accident, but i was still bitter. and yet He still chose to shower me with His blessings and grace. i realized that as a believer, i have a choice of my reactions to difficult/painful/ugly situations. if i didn't know the Lord, i would not have understood the point of this car accident and would continue complaining & be angry about it. when i left the facility, i prayed as i drove back repenting & with thanksgiving. i thought "ah, so my reaction to this whole car accident showed why we are set apart from this world". God continues to amaze me with His lovingkindness by revealing His purposefulness and intentions in every single circumstance. sure, it would've been nice to not have mindlessly backed into my housemate's car, or have to make my parents pay more for my insurance. but if it weren't for these [at the time] terrible situations, i would not have been able to recognize the ugliness within my own heart, the need to repent of my sinfulness, and the glorious and beautiful attributes of God. praise Him for extending grace upon wicked souls like myself, and praise Him for allowing His Spirit to constantly mold us and shape us into His likeness.

okay, this post took a lot longer than expected, so i'm going to have to finish up the next part when i have time.